Too Close for Comfort

This post is extremely personal and difficult for me to articulate. In terms of rawness, my other posts have been skimming the surface. This is as raw as a fresh wound that has been deeply cut by a sharp scalpel. This is as personal as going to the bathroom in front of a large audience. If that doesn't seem too daunting, imagine your most intimate moments, the things you do when you know that no one else is watching being broad casted live for everyone to see. That is how personal this post is about to get.

One Step At A Time

 

I have encountered many tribulations since being diagnosed with Crohn's Disease almost eight years ago. When being told I had this disease at the tender age of 18, I was clueless and ignorant to how this drastic change was going to impact my life. Like most people at that age, I didn't take it seriously and never even thought about educating myself on the matter. A lot has changed since that fateful day, and I have learned that the only control anyone inflicted with this terrible disease can have is knowledge. Research and knowledge are the sharpest weapons we can use to protect ourselves from Irritable Bowel Disease. Even though this disease wreaks havoc on our bodies, we must utilize our brains as the most powerful tool.

Di-ver-gent:

Often in our daily lives we spot a person that stands out from the rest. They are different, and we notice right away. They suffer from some kind of ailment or handicap that does not resemble the norm. We stare, sometimes too harshly and for too long. Not because we are trying to, but because our brains are wired to instantaneously detect something that diverges from the ordinary. No one really gives much thought to what they are doing even if deep inside we know we should just look away. No one really takes the time to put themselves in that other person's shoes...until that person becomes you.

The Storm Within

We all encounter times in our lives where our world is spinning out of control, like a vicious tornado that destroys everything in its path, resulting in devastating consequences. Those times have been greatly amplified for me as a lifetime of life altering events have been crammed into the past three years. I have experienced an array of emotions that immensely challenged my capabilities.  These arduous events tested my endurance, patience, and perseverance every day.  They forced me to muster every ounce of strength I could find and use that as a shield to keep me from completely falling apart.

When a Nightmare turns into a Reality

I felt a hot breath on the base of my neck as I alarmingly turned around.  There was a thick tension in the air as his angry eyes locked intensely into mine.  With not even a second to react, goosebumps shocked my body as I was being picked up with an aggression I had never felt before.  I knew in the pit of my gut my life was about to end when he reached into his pocket for a knife.  I awoke suddenly; confused, a bit disoriented, and relieved I was only dreaming.  Was this just another bad dream or was my body trying to tell me something? 

The Thing You Think You Cannot Do

It seems like a lifetime has past since I last wrote a post.  I am overwhelmed by the whirlwind of events that have taken place in the past month.  Shortly after posting my Hospital Horrors post, I made another trip back to the hospital.  This was no coincidence,  as I was putting off going back for over a month.  I began experiencing a pain that I have never felt before; a piercing sharp pain that throbbed right below my chest.  This pain was intensified by standing or walking, which interfered with the progress I was making from my spinal compression fractures. 

Hospital Horrors

Hospitals. The sound of that word makes most people cringe. If you have ever been hospitalized, you know how unpleasant the experience can be. The dreariness from all the illness encompasses you as the smell of sterilization makes you want to gag. Hallways seem to stretch on for miles as you catch a glimpse of each patient lying helplessly in their own misery. No matter how high you turn up the heat, there is always a coldness that lingers in the air.